Just because I found this article that made me laugh out loud several times. Haha. I'm NOT sure where it's from. So, don't sue me.

Wheee. I'm re-typing this whole fucking thing. Here we go.

Do you beleive in Aliens?

VV: I would love to. I would love to be abducted and have them stealing my sperm and conducting weird experiments. It would be fantastic. I have never had any of that weird stuff happen to me. Maybe I am just blind.

Do collect anything weird?

VV: I collect 'DO NOT DISTURB' signs from hotels. I've got maybe 400 of them. I was thinking of having an exhibition. You can always tell the quality of a hotel by the 'DO NOT DISTURB' sign. If they have spent money on the design it is a good hotel. They should probably just scan the pictures of the 'DO NOT DISTURB' signs onto their websites to help us choose the right ones.

What is your idea of Hell?

VV: Probably the Christian idea of Heaven: sitting on a fucking cloud all day, listening to this old bastard with grey hair. I think the Christian idea of Hell will be my Heaven. I think after the cold of Finland I'll be ready for Hell. I'll send you a postcard.

What's the most violent thing you have done?

VV: I've always been kind of a nice guy. I've never gotten into fights and that. I am really bad at team sports but for some reason I still wanted to be the David Beckham of my generation. When I went to my first soccer practice we had a rehearsal match and I was determined to get it in the goal, but someone took the ball off me. So I puched that fucker on the nose and then climbed up a tree and wouldn't come down until my parents picked me up. It was then I decided team sports weren't for me. They cause violence in me.

Do you ever hear voices in your head?

VV: Yeah, when i haven't been sleeping at all. I am super-sensitive to staying awake. That is the reason I have never done speed. If I am awake for 24 hours I start hearing these weird, childlike voices in my head.

Do they tell you to do things?

VV: Yeah. They tell me to kill myself and things like that. That is when I drop a Xanax and go to bed. To drive me onto the brink of insanity just spike my drink with speed.

Have you ever seen a dead body?

VV: No, but I have carried one in a coffin. That was my grandmother, I almost saw that body. The Finnish winter is harsh and the graveyard was slippery; we nearly dropped the coffin into the grave. Embarrasing moment. Some of us nearly slipped into the grave. I was inches from seeing a real dead body. Five inches. It would have been a great laugh in a TV comedy but not in real life.

What is the closest you have come to death?

VV: Being intoxicated out of my brains and hopping from balcony to balcony on the 10th floor of a hotel. It was a hobby of mine back in the day. It is probably one of the reasons I am scared of heights. Realising the next morning you have a terrible hangover and the comedown of being terribly fucked up and thinking 'What did I do?' Being in a rock band, sometimes you need to act irresponsibly, you have to test your limits every now and then and hope you survive.

If you had to have sex with an animal what would it be?

VV: A sperm whale. I've always been fascinated by sea creatures and it'd be a good session. First she could go on top, then I could go on top.

A bit of blowhole action too?

VV: Every hole possible. They are lacking in holes. There are so many things you could do with a sperm whale. You could be there all day.

Coprophilia, beastiality or necrophilia?

VV: Coprophilia, of course. I've drunk my bandmate's piss already so that's the next step for us bonding as brothers.

So you're turning your back on the whale already?

VV: Come on. Why not? Necrophilia feels a bit desperate. You made me choose before. We didn't talk about shit then. It would be interesting.

It would make for an interesting video.

VV: I would only do it to a cover of 'We Are The World'. That would be great.

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Wow. That took me an hour to type. Mostly because I was flipping back to look at the interview article on a webpage.

Here's the original: [link]

That is NOT my photobucket.
And. Please tell me if I've made any mistake. Or if you know where this article is from.

And note that that was only PART of the interview. I may post the first half of it later. Ugh.

Anyway, thank you Ville for being so entertaining. :3

Check out Ville in Apocalyptica - Bittersweet : [link]

EDIT: Just found that this article is from Bizarre Magazine.